вторник, 19 апреля 2011 г.

Canadian Sayings. In English

To improve your English and get to know Canadian sayings I write here some of them:
1. About bad planning: They planted their crop before they built their fence.
2. About boredom: He is sharp as a drill but twice as boring.
3. Busyness: Running around like a chicken with its head cut off.
That is, frantically busy to no certain goal. This comes from an old practice that a farmer might use to kill a hen. The farmer would chop off its head and let the decapitated chicken run around to bleed it. It's a method of exsanguination more core convenient than hanging up by the feet. Some headless hens dash about for four or three  minutes.
4. Canadian Advice: Love many, trust few, and always paddle your own canoe.
5. Canadian pride: Eagles may soar but beavers don't get sucked into jet engines.
6. Children:
Child: I'm bored. What can I do?
Harassed mother: Take off your socks and pee in your shoes.
****
Child: Where are you going, Dad?
Dad: Crazy. Want to come?
In other words, stop bugging me, it's none your business.
7. Crybaby: He's a real tear bag!
8. He is so fat when he swims on the ocean whales sing "We are family”.
9. She made this with her own two little hooves. This sarcastic put-down about bad food is uttered by someone who will never have to worry again about being served by the person to whom the bovine insult was addressed.
10. Hatred: I wouldn’t cross the street to piss on him if he were on fire or even just starting to smoulder.
11. Hearing: There’s not a thing wrong with her hearing; she can hear milk curdle. A son describes his ninety-year-old mother’s hearing.
12. Home: Born on a raft. This is said of a person who carelessly leaves doors and windows open.
13. Laughter: I laughed so hard a tear ran down my leg.
14. Machismo: Who is the handsomest man here and why am I?
15. Marriage: His wife asked to be seen in something long and flowing – so he dropped her in the river. God made them and the devil matched them.
16. Paying attention: take the cotton batten out of your ears and put it in your mouth. In other words, listen and then shut up.
17. Pomposity: She has found a new humility. Her latest book is “Famous people who have met me”.
18. Pouting: She had a lower lip on her like a school doorstep. How about a ride on your lower lip?
19. Sin: The Devil makes pots, but never lids. You can’t hide your sins
20. Smooth talking: She can tell people to go to hell and they look forward to the trip.
21. Uselessness: useless as a striptease at a nudist camp.
22. Weather Forecasting: Do you know the ancient aboriginal way of predicting a long winter? Never mind fat squirrels burying walnuts and acorns. See how much wood white man has piled in his barn.
23. Wedding: a wedding ring is like a tourniquet. It stops your circulation.

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